Always on Vacation, Always Working???

March 1st, 2010

A few weeks ago I had a conversation with my father and I shared with him that I had recently taken a day off.  His response to me was quite interesting “I think of you as always working and always on vacation.” I thought about his comment for a few moments and realized it was quite accurate.  As an entrepreneur, strategic planning expert, and “by design” coach, his comments meant my plan for my life is working.  You see, like most business owners, I went into business to create the balance and flexibility I need in my daily life.  My dad’s comments were validation that the pieces have come together in a way that others can see, and can take notice.

I have a client who decided she wanted to work with me because she liked my “style.”  In light of my Dad’s comment her’s have taken on new meaning.  I realize that my new client is able to see the congruent nature of my life (she commented on it in our first session) even in how we do business together.  I am an example for her of the blend of work life balance she is striving to create.  As you strive to do good business with your clients or lead in an organization, make sure the example you set is one that others would want to follow.

You can live a lifestyle that is enviable by others as well.  It is possible for each of us if we are willing to commit to living out of our own definition of success; aligning your values to your work, relationships and other areas of importance in your life.    Just that small simple action will begin the process of transformation.

It was nice when my Dad said to me, “when I grow up I want to be like you” it is a sign I must be doing something right!

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A Day at HP

February 19th, 2010

Today I spent the day with MBEN, the Black Employee Network at Hewlett Packard.   I spent the afternoon with the group discussing the power of influence as a tool for career success.  I have to say it was a great afternoon and the group seemed to appreciate my comments.  Sometimes people get disconnected from their own ability to influence the world around them.  During the event, the group decided they wanted to take a picture of those in the room locally (I was doing the workshop on conference call with people calling in from around the US) and everyone wanted to be in the photo.  Well I influenced a person walking past the conference room to take a picture of us.  One of my hosts watched in amazement.  She asked how did you get him to stop what he was doing, delay his destination, do what you asked and leave with a smile on his face.  It lies in 3 simple steps:

The Set -Up

The Ask

The Follow -Up

This 3 pronged approach is one of the tools I shared at during the workshop.  When you set things up well, allowing others to be of contribution, you increase the likelihood that your desired outcome will be achieved.  Many times when we make requests of others we do so in a manner that is not engaging or endearing.  I made my request EASY TO SAY YES TO!  Often times people make requests that are easy to say NO to.  Make your ask EASY TO SAY YES TO!  The last step in the process is to follow up.  In this example the follow up was a simple THANK YOU!  Our photographer left happy to have helped and we got what we needed.  You can create this kind of simple success everyday in your life if you are willing to follow the simple steps of SET-UP, ASK and FOLLOW UP!

Now go out there and …

Live your Desire By Design,

Cornelia

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Niche to be rich…Really???

January 12th, 2010

I know many entrepreneurs and business owners who believe that if they select a Niche market they will limit their possibilities and ultimately limit their earning potential.  This is not the case.  I have a colleague who markets herself as only working with female attorney’s.  In reality there are several men who are attracted to her message (she is a personal stylist) and purchase her services.  Identifying and speaking authentically to your target market is what allows you to create the credibility necessary to do the work you were destined to do in the world.

Bill Cosby said it this way “I don’t know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody.”

Creating a niche is about defining your area of expertise – both what you deliver and to whom.  Experts are sought after for their unique skills and abilities and attract more clients because of the results they help deliver.   In addition to having a specialty or expertise, you can also niche whom you deliver that expertise to.  For example, you may be a wealth generation expert who works with solo-prenuers to create 7-digit wealth in less than 5 years.  Targeting “the who” requires a clear understanding of your target clients needs and motivations; once you have done this you should craft a marketing message that will meet those needs.   Remember, a market niche is about whom you are targeting – it does not limit whom you can work with.  As the saying goes…niche to be rich!!!

Some things to consider when defining your niche:

  • Who are the people or business that would use your product or service?
  • Which of these groups do you have the greatest desire to work with?
  • Does this group congregate in the same place and can you get access to that space?
  • Which groups are you already serving or do you already have relationships with?
  • What give you an advantage over your colleagues or sets you apart from the rest?
  • What unique service do you provide this group and what need does it meet?
  • What are your targets urgent needs and how do you meet them?
  • What would your target like to create or have and how do you meet that desire?
  • What are the benefits to your client and what is the unique way you provide that benefit (i.e. faster, more cost efficiently etc.)

Niche marketing is not about limiting who you serve it is about clarifying your message to the marketplace so that those who are interested in what you have to offer can find you and purchase your services.

This strategy can be used by employees as well.  Are you an IT manager or are you an IT Manager in the entertainment industry who helps companies create IT access on Movie sets that is hacker proof.  Wherever you may desire to work, having the story as to why you can deliver outstanding results to that industry or community of people will be key to your success.

Live your desire by design,

Cornelia

P.S.  Here are some excellent resources on this subject: Get Clients Now by CJ Hayden, Book Yourself Solid by Michael Port and www.clientattraction.com.

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Get a running start on the New Year!

January 1st, 2010

Happy New Year!!

As you prepare to make 2010 the best year of your life to date, there are several things you can do to hit the ground running.

  • GET CLEAR – Define what matters most to you in your life and make time for it.  Clarify the changes you want to make in 2010 and how your life will look when those changes are implemented.  The clearer you can be about your desires the easier it will be for you to recognize them when they appear.
  • GET PRESENT – Focus on the task at hand and be present in the current situation. Multi-tasking adds stress and can create rework.  A recent study showed that an interruption from a task created 45 minutes of additional work time to complete the task.  When what you are doing is critical get solely focused on the task at hand in your personal and professional life.
  • GET MOVING – Release those endorphins by incorporating some exercise in your routine.  Exercise helps to clear your head and morning exercise sets most people up for making healthier choices throughout their day.
  • GET PLANNING – Take charge of your life and your time by planning your activities and protecting the time set aside for you.  I talk with my clients all the time about working in the “flow”  when you are most productive.  For me, this means working with clients one-on-one when I am dedicated to them and nothing else.  It means writing when I am most clear headed and my home is the quite.
  • GET HELP – You do not have to be super woman (or man).  Enlist the help of others to get critical tasks done
  • HAVE FUN – Fun is for NOW not later.  Incorporate something fun into your daily activity.

Living your desire by design at the core is about filling your life with those things that will allow you to contribute your highest self.  Follow these tips and make 2010 your best year yet!

Live your desire by design,

Cornelia

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Self Care – Really???

December 22nd, 2009

This morning I had an 8am appointment at the orthodontist, a place I have not been since I was 16 (getting my braces off) and now just days after my birthday there I sat with the “tween” generation waiting for the doctor to see me.   Once the Dr. was ready to see me he did a through exam, took x-rays, and then explained my options.  You guessed it, I need braces.

I have been having significant jaw pain due to the shifting of my teeth, so for the next 11 months or so I will have braces…again.  Upon hearing the news, I called a few friends and got several interesting responses including really and why??

Self-care can sometimes be uncomfortable.  For me it means about 11 months of metal in my mouth and the discomfort of my teeth being put back where they belong.  At the end of the process, I get straight teeth and eliminate my pain and discomfort.   Braces are not that big of a deal in the grand scheme of things.  I found myself thinking a lot about my friend Mary today (the woman mentioned in a recent post who is beating breast cancer).  She and I had our annual Christmas lunch yesterday and next month she will be having reconstructive surgery on both breasts.  Talk about uncomfortable, between the double mastectomy, the expanders (to make room for the implants) and then the actual implant surgery NOW that has lots of space for discomfort.  I was reminded that in the grand scheme of things, my 11 months is NOTHING in comparison to what she has gone through to care for herself.  In both cases I believe the discomfort and sacrifice was well worth it.

Tomorrow morning @ 9am Eastern I begin my adult journey with braces.  Wish me luck and a beautiful smile.

In parting, I leave you with this question… Are you willing to do the uncomfortable work of self care, not just the massages and manicures?   I invite you to declare in the new year that you will do whatever is necessary to care for yourself, even if it is uncomfortable.

Happy Holidays!

Cornelia

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The Power of Authenticity

December 17th, 2009

This morning, I watched the announcement of the Screen Actors Guild (SAG) awards.  It was announced that the movie Precious based on the novel Push by Sapphire received 3 nominations (Best Actress, Best Supporting Actress, Best Cast).  Last night I watched the Mo’Nique show where she had the Director, Author and several members of the cast on  the show.   After hearing the cast and crew talk about the movie I found myself moved to tears this morning.

Why you might ask, beyond the story told in Precious, I was touched by the grace and humility of the cast and crew.   I was reminded of the power of authenticity in story telling.  What resonates for each of us when we hear the story of another are the moments of authentic communication when we have the opportunity to “get” the challenges and triumphs of another.  The past few days I have been wrapping up my work with my one-on-one clients as the year comes to a close and I want to ask you what I have asked many of them.

Will you allow the gift of your authentic self to be given in 2010 or will you continue to hold the true you in excile from those of us waiting to meet you?

Thanks to the cast and crew of Precious for dramatically causing people to ask this and other powerful questions for themselves and challenge their ability to support others in the world.

Happy Holidays!

Precious Movie Poster

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Making the Holiday's Easy

December 1st, 2009

It is amazing you have even found time to read this post as you prepare for parties, family celebrations, and the many other festivities that come with the holiday season.  Many of my clients ask me how I keep it all in balance during the holidays.  Well here are my strategies:

Prioritize functions based on what matters most – I have a client who decided to relocate his business during the month of November.  He told his family and friends that although he was not going to be able to celebrate this holiday season with them, his focus was on being able to create holiday memories for years to come.  He has opted to spend the holidays networking, meeting new people and creating a new life for himself in a new location.  Short term sacrifice for long term gain.  Whether you choose to focus on family or business during this holiday season, be clear as to why you are choosing that focus and what you intend to manifest as a result.  My client intends to manifest increased wealth and the flexibility to spend more time with family and friends in the long run.

Take time for yourself – With all the demands of the season, air travel, and other close quarter experiences, you may find yourself under the weather during one of the most festive times of the year.  By exercising, eating sensibly, and keeping your routines and daily rituals you may find you will feel better at the end of this holiday season than in seasons past.  More than anything else do what is necessary for you to keep your energy up and be available for that which matters most in your life.

Spend CASH for Presents – The holiday season is the time when so many of us decide that the only way we can show we care is to by the most expensive gift possible.  The truth is, the most precious gift you can give anyone is the gift of your authentic self.  If you decide to partake of the consumerism of the season do so wisely.  SPEND CASH for all of your gifts, not cash advances but cash on hand.  Don’t create new debt.  Be creative with presents and choose to give gifts to those who matter most.  Agree with friends and family on a spending limit or choose to make gifts for those in your life.  Let your creativity be fully expressed.

Keep your sense of humor – The holidays can be tough for many reasons, you may be reminded of the loss of a loved one, or the season may remind you of other things in your life that you have longed for and do not have.  I encourage my clients to keep a sense of humor and find the joy and laughter in any situation.

Use Gift Bags – I know it sounds trivial but gift bags with tissue paper are much easier to wrap than boxes, paper and bows.  With your busy lifestyle you can place gifts in bags outside the home of your favorite aunt or best friend.  It is to the point now where throughout the season I keep tissue paper and bags in my car just in case.  People always comment on how nicely things are wrapped…they have no idea (well I guess they do now lol).

Go with the flow – Don’t get caught up in some external expectations for your holiday season and don’t be to rigid with yourself.  If Christmas dinner is scheduled for 4pm and it doesn’t start until 4:30 don’t panic.  I promise it won’t change the taste of the pumpkin pie.  When hick-ups happen (flight delays, traffic, long lines) try to find something pleasurable in the moment.  I usually think about all the things I am sure I have been spared from (like accidents) by waiting in line.  I have been amazed when I take this attitude at the life changing conversations or opportunities that appear as a result.

Have FUN – It is so easy to get bogged down in the “obligations” or should’s (christmas dinner at the in-laws, your bosses party, your clients social function) of the holidays that we forget to enjoy the season.  Go see a Christmas light show, enjoy your local traditions or create new ones.  Do something for yourself that will bring a smile to your face.

By caring for what matters most during the holiday season you may emerge on the other side happier, more rested, and feeling like you truly enjoyed festivities.

Live your desire by design,

Cornelia

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What should I do before the end of the year??

November 30th, 2009

Several of my clients who are in business for themselves or who own small businesses have asked how they can maximize the time before the holidays to prepare the business for a phenomenal 2010.   Here are some things I recommend for my clients that may assist you as well.

Prime the Pump:

  • Offer a Christmas special on your product or service, which can be purchased for someone else.
  • Offer significant discounts to organizations which you are a member of
  • Include a discount coupon in your holiday invoices
  • Collaborate with other entrepreneurs outside your industry to throw a customer appreciation holiday party.  You can share customers with those you normally refer business to.

Maximize your tax deductions:

  • Meet with your accountant to discuss the companies current financial state and where/how you can maximize deductions during the last month of the year
  • GET YOUR PAPERS IN ORDER – while the kids are waiting for Santa or playing with their new toys take a few moments (or hours) to organize your receipts and papers for your accountant.  The more you do the less they will charge you.
  • INCORPORATE – if you have not done so already.  The tax laws are set up for businesses so take full advantage and incorporate
  • Make contributions to your company 401K plan – this is especially big for small businesses with only one employee you.  Talk with your accountant to learn how you can save more than 30% of your first 100,000 earned for retirement!
  • Stock up – Need some toner, paper, pads, pens etc. the day after Christmas shop for the business and get the expense deduction this tax year.
  • Thinking of upgrading – get your new office equipment this tax year instead of Jan 1
  • Pay your bills early – go into ’10 with some pre-paid assets on the books
  • Don’t put off until tomorrow what you can expense today – travel, goods or services you will need in the first quarter of ’10, equipment repairs, maintenance, etc.
  • Any inventory to write off – depending on how you do your accounting you may have damaged goods you can write off this year.
  • Defer income to the first week of January.
  • Take advantage of all the home based business tax deductions
  • Did your business take a loss – if so depending on how you incorporated you can offset the loss from other income and decrease your tax liability
  • Don’t forget to 1099 your contractors

These simple steps will help you to jump start 2010 ready to provide outstanding service and be rewarded with sky rocketing revenues.

Live your desire by design.

Cornelia

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Giving Thanks not just on Thanksgiving

November 25th, 2009

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!!

I don’t know about you, but every Thanksgiving my mother fixes a huge meal.  For as long as I can remember, we have always had several traditions which for me make Thanksgiving, Thanksgiving.   We have always had someone new at the table and before we eat, everyone has the opportunity to reflect on what they are truly thankful for.  Our family is blessed to share thanksgiving with a centenarian.  It is always a pleasure to be in her presence, so full of history and perspective.

I was reading recently about Thanksgiving and the impact giving thanks (showing gratitude) can have on our daily life.  Assuming an attitude of gratitude not only improves our mood it can change our lives.  The movies What the Bleep do we know and The Secret demonstrate this nicely.  Several of my clients ask me how do you focus on the positive.  Here are my 7 tips:

Limit Television Watching - Especially the news.  I heard someone once say the news reports what has already happened.  He would rather live his life than find out what happened in others lives.  The point here is this, select what you want to know of news via online media and watch the reports but limit your exposure to the “if it bleeds it leads” news cycle.

Pursue your full potential – Many people define success in their own lives based on the standards of others.  Those who are most successful in life realize their own unique potential.  They are not bound by the expectations or standards of the world.  They have determined what success means to them and have followed those standards.  Look at people like Alexandra Brown or Oprah Winfrey 2 women who made it their mission to empower the women of the world and bring a positive message about the possibilities in life and who have been richly rewarded in most aspects of their lives not just financially.

Create a ritual or habit to focus on the positive – For me it is taking a moment to find the positive in my current situation, acknowledging the positive and asking for more positive in every area of my life.  I know it sounds simple but it helps keep me in balanced and focused on the beauty of life.

Give BACK – Living life at the speed of thought, many of us get so caught up in what we have to do, we don’t have space to make a contribution to those who might benefit from our gifts and talents but may not be able to afford them.  For me, it is why I dedicate 10% of my one-on-one client time to those unable to afford my fee.  It allows me the opportunity to give to a deserving woman-prenuer  who would not otherwise have the opportunity to be coached.  I give back in other ways as well by serving on the board of a leadership training organization for high school girls.  It is my way of impacting the future one young woman at a time.  What can you do to systematically give back to your community in ways that will have lasting impact.

Thank others, Consistently – Find reasons to give thanks, express your gratitude, or acknowledge those in your world.  I keep thank you cards on hand and mail them every chance I get.  I have systems in place to acknowledge referral partners, clients, and friends.  Thanking others helps me to be present to the joy they provide to me and the many ways they enhance my life.  By giving thanks to them I am reminded of the many gifts they have given to me and even more grateful for their presence in my life.

Don’t Complain – What we give our attention to and focus on expands.  When we complain, we focus on that which we do not want.  Complaining enhances our feelings of dissatisfaction, lack, and denial of our desires.

Follow positive people on twitter – I like to think of myself as one who is a positive tweeter, one who gets you thinking, helps you focus on and expand what you truly desire in life.  Here are some of my favorites to follow @deepak_chopra, @marwilliamson, @DrWayneWDyer to name a few.  You can always follow me @CorneliaShipley

You can take many actions to infuse gratitude and positivity in your life.  Take a moment to think about those things you can do to focus on what brings you joy daily.  Commit to at least one action you can take daily to focus on all that you have instead of what is missing in your life.

Live your desire by design,

Cornelia

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Designing Partnerships in Business and Life

November 23rd, 2009

Recently, I was in conversation with a friend who was expressing concern about a decision a colleague made. So here is just a bit of the story…   A business partnership (2 partners) decided to consider an investment in a new venture. One partner, Tom has said that he is willing to front the money for the expansion but that John (the other partner) would need to manage the day to day running of the venture. Tom’s position is that this is the fair thing to do since he is financing the venture, and has said he would be disappointed in John (who has no capital) if John did not agree. In this case, Tom has had no discussion with John about his expectations even though Tom has been expecting John to do the lion’s share of the work once the venture is up and running.

Tom may be setting himself up for significant disappointment and potentially the end of the partnership. John may feel disrespected, devalued and unimportant or he may be in full support of Tom’s position. Either way, Tom is proposing to communicate his plan as THE plan not as an option. Not a way I would recommend my clients treat their business partners.

I found the story very interesting and it got me to thinking about how we make assumptions about those we collaborate with in business and in life. Whether you are in a partnership (business, friendship, or romantic relationship) there are some things you can do to ensure that the relationship “works” and no one feels “slighted.”

Assume Nothing – In life we make assumptions all the time, about what people will or will not do, accept, want, or deliver. This can get us in trouble. Don’t be like Tom and assume your partner, coworker, spouse, or employee will simply agree. Respect him or her enough to have the conversation so you KNOW vs. assuming.

Communicate Your Expectations – In the scenario above Tom has expected his partner John to take on daily management of this new venture, but he has never communicated that expectation to John. I had a teacher once say that in life you get what you negotiate. Be clear about what you want, need, and expect in the situation. Communicate clearly, and understand what your alternatives are to no agreement.  Negotiate from that position and be open to the outcome being different than either of you expected.

Co- Create Your Plan Together – It is appropriate to strategize separately but when committing to take action you should do so with an agreed to plan that is Co-Created by all parties. What one creates, one is usually committed to. By working together to determine your plan you can ensure both alignment and ownership between all parties.

Be Open to Change – As your plan unfolds you may need to course correct. Don’t be so rigid that you cannot adjust to changes in market conditions, or listen to shifting desires or priorities of a partner. You never know what opportunities you may discover.

Partnership in life and business is about having mutual respect and trust. At the end of the day, if you and your partner have talked and are committed to the strategies you have developed, you have a higher probability in exceeding your expectations.

Live your desire by design,
Cornelia

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